Rescuers Call Off Search for Belfast Man Lost in Infinity Scarf

Belfast — Waldo and Knox County authorities announced they’ll no longer search for a man who went missing inside his expensive scarf on his way to a wine tasting in Rockport.

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The man was last seen outside his home adjusting a cashmere infinity scarf. Rescuers discovered his Prius parked on the street, but no signs of the man were found.

Search dogs followed the man’s trail, but it ran cold at his scarf, found abandoned on the sidewalk.

Rescuers tried coaxing the dogs to continue to follow the trail, but they reacted fearfully, refusing to take orders.

“A lot of people think these are just scarves, but they forget about the ‘infinity’ part,” chief rescuer Tony Adair said in a statement.

“If you’re trying to adjust it and aren’t really paying attention, you can get swallowed up into the abyss,” Adair warned.

Adair also warned people from Belfast are particularly at risk.

“They tend to lose themselves in thought, thinking of ways to remain humorless, while also concentrating on how best to vaguely threaten litigation toward jokes they don’t appreciate or understand,” he said.

“That combination of humorlessness and self-importance is dangerous.”


5 thoughts on “Rescuers Call Off Search for Belfast Man Lost in Infinity Scarf”

  1. Weird things been going on down that area ever since the State built that new bridge over the Passy. Did they search out to Isleboro?

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