Portland’s Boldest New Microbrewery Asks ‘What if Bad Beer Were Really Expensive?’

Portland — The trendiest new brewery in Portland, located in what was once a thriving fish market, is serving up cold, fresh, horrible beer 7 nights a week.

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Boatswain’s Brewery is the brainchild of Craig Amann, originally of Dartmouth, MA. Amann was drawn to Portland’s thriving beer scene in the early 2000s and decided to try his hand at brewing.

The result? A pungent, almost undrinkable grog that stings the tongue and waters the eyes. And Portland beer drinkers can’t get enough of it.

“At $9 a pint, we can barely keep up with demand,” Amann said. His brewery serves two signature beers: Stout, Stout, Let it All Out, a thick black beer with a kick of kale, and Hoppy Days Are Beer Again, an IPA flavored with a mix of hops and the rubber bands used to keep lobster claws closed.

“I really don’t know what I’m doing,” Amann told us. He has no formal beer training, which gives him a bit of outsider status.

“I just watched some YouTube videos and made these beers and people were willing to pay a lot for them,” he said. In fact, he had two previous brews his friends told him tasted delicious.

“No one bought those,” Amann said.

While his brewery does great business selling its awful beers, Amann is looking to the future. Seeing the popularity of alcoholic drinks that taste like cola, root beer, and even Mountain Dew, Amann has decided to brew something called Not Your Father’s Moxie.

“It tastes exactly like Moxie, but with booze in it,” he said. “It’s terrible.”

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5 thoughts on “Portland’s Boldest New Microbrewery Asks ‘What if Bad Beer Were Really Expensive?’”

  1. If it tastes like Diet Moxie, that stuff is nasty (like Pepsi + WD40). Next thing you know, they’ll make Not Your Sister’s Coffee Brandy!

  2. Here at the Lubec Brewing Company we tried are hand at a lovely “Sea Hash Mash” when we couldn’t get no sea hash we used our Yankee Ingenuity aka “poverty breeds creativity” we discovered we can make some pretty mean lager using the spent fouled nets from the salmon pens to make a malt, tastes like burnt tire tea infused lager, but sure cleans out the ‘ol sinuses, plus we get to promote “Up-cycling” on our label, win win I’d say!

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