Experts Warn Barrel of Sea Hash From 1995 Down to Last Few Tokes

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Matinicus — Maine’s top experts on marijuana and its derivative products warn the mythical tub of contraband hashish that washed ashore in 1995 is almost depleted.

“At the current rate of consumption, we estimate this hash won’t make it past Super Bowl Sunday,” John Ames told a group of gathered reporters.

The sea hash arrived on the island almost 25 years ago, dumped overboard by smugglers in Gulf of Maine.

“The Coast Guard was giving them chase, and it was dead of night, so they dumped the barrels over before the Coasties caught up to them,” Ames explained.

“One barrel washed up on shore here, but there were supposedly half a dozen barrels in all,” Ames said, although other members of the panel said it was more like 20 barrels.

Anyone who’s experienced the sea hash over the years has commented on its strong taste and aroma of diesel fuel.

“They had it soaking in number 2 fuel to keep the dogs off the smell,” Ames said.

Hundreds, perhaps thousands, of parties up and down the coast of Maine have been rescued by the arrival of sea hash, and its potency has become legendary.

“I think it gets better with age,” Ames said. “Got me just about crispy-fried last time I had a puff.”

The panel of experts recommends any and all persons on the coast of Maine with diving licenses work together to locate the remaining barrels.

“Otherwise, we’re flat-out,” Ames said.

Until the other barrels are located, Ames has recommended getting out some paperclips to give the existing barrel a good scraping.

“There’s still some good tokes left, by the Jesus.”

 

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6 thoughts on “Experts Warn Barrel of Sea Hash From 1995 Down to Last Few Tokes”

  1. The diesel aroma must add a distinctive flavor that only a crazy Mainer would enjoy! Sort of like V.S.O.P. Cognac with a kick.

  2. We occasionally get it off the South East Coast of Ireland. Normally from trawler nets which rake it up from the bottom. It was supposed to have been dumped there by smugglers in the 80’s & 90’s. It doesnt taste of diesel but it has a bad taste off it. But it does get you stoned!

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