NSA Cryptologists Close to Deciphering Maine Vanity Plate

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Fort Meade, MD — The National Security Agency believes it’s only a matter of time before it understands the message hidden on the license plate of Leslie Pelletier’s 2014 Chevy Equinox.

According to a spokesperson for the NSA, a team of the nation’s top cryptographic minds have been toiling day and night to understand what ‘ILGV2BO’ means.

“Since we have access to Pelletier’s Facebook, messenger, and text history, we were able to figure out she lives a largely uninteresting life, free of scandal, so it’s extremely unlikely the license plate is something ribald or in reference to drugs,” the spokesperson said.

The NSA drew on its vast repository of files containing personal information on every American in hopes it might help them better understand Pelletier’s personality and quirks.

Many plates require understanding the person who ordered the plates.

“We had a hard time with CRZYGMA until we researched the owner and found her to be a fun-loving grandmother of 5 children. Her plate stands for ‘crazy grandma.'”

But ‘ILGV2BO’ has the top minds in the country scratching their heads.

“We thought it was ‘I love’ something, but there’s a ‘G’ in there, so it doesn’t seem like that’s the intent.”

The random number 2 in the middle is further hindering progress.

“A lot of times it means ‘too,’ as in ‘also,’ but who knows with this one.”

Pelletier said she’d never give up the secret, but the NSA is confident based on its past experiences.

“It’s pretty simple, really. We just build a profile and try to figure it out from there. Some are quite easy. For example, the ‘A55HOLE’ plate spotted in Rockland was quickly cracked when our code breakers realized the 5 was a cipher for the letter ‘S.'”

 

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8 thoughts on “NSA Cryptologists Close to Deciphering Maine Vanity Plate”

  1. Simple if you remember that nail biter in 1946.

    Island falls Loses Great Victory To Benedicta, Overtime.

    Check the age of the driver. Duh

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