If You Use Facebook in Maine, Mark Zuckerberg Probably Stole Your Grammy’s Chowder Recipe

Menlo Park, CA — The Facebook personal data scandal is a fire founder Mark Zuckerberg is struggling to contain, but even more impropriety has come to light in the wake of the shattering revelations.

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If you’ve ever used Facebook Messenger to share your Grammy’s best chowder recipe, Mark Zuckerberg has made it and served it to his guests.

What’s even worse is sources report Zuckerberg is claiming the recipe as his own.

“My Grammy put rosemary in her seafood chowder and it really set it off,” one person told us. The person wished to remain anonymous for the purposes of the interview, but was invited to dine with the CEO when Mark Zuckerberg practiced acting human while visiting Maine.

“Right down to using a pound of butter, the recipe was exactly the same as the one I shared with my cousin over Facebook messenger.”

Depending on where you live in Maine, Zuckerberg may also have stolen your Grammy’s recipe for maple fudge or baked beans.

The dead-eyed and emotionless founder of Facebook was unavailable for comment, but a spokesperson did issue the following statement:

“Mark Zuckerberg’s chowder, while extraordinarily similar in taste, preparation, and ingredients to the secret recipe your Gram-Gram held dear, is an invention of Mr. Zuckerberg’s own grandmother.”

The statement also said that Facebook’s term of use clearly spell out any and all data passed between users on Facebook will be collected by Facebook and then shared with whoever the worst possible entity with the smoothest pitch is.




3 thoughts on “If You Use Facebook in Maine, Mark Zuckerberg Probably Stole Your Grammy’s Chowder Recipe”

  1. I shouldn’t have to spell this out to everyone, but the only way you can safely use Facebook without getting personal information harvested, is for the first sentence of every post to be a paradox, just like this one.

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