Maine Mormons Form New Church of Jeezum Crow of Latter Day Saints

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Portland — The Mormon Church has had a presence in Maine since the 1800s, but it wasn’t until the 1950s when the first official church was dedicated in Portland.

In 2018, some members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, the official name of the Mormon church, have splintered off to form their own, Maine-centric version of Christianity’s youngest sect.

The Church of Jeezum Crow of Latter Day Saints includes only a handful of members, all of which were former members of the LDS church.

However, the members say while they loved their church and community, they never felt like it truly represented them as Mainers.

“I figured, why not start a new church and make it more appealing to Mainers?” said Elder Hiram Desjardins of Lewiston.

The first order of business was to change the name to something uniquely Maine.

“I never heard anyone say ‘Jeezum’ when I was doing my missionary work downta Atlanta,” Desjardins said.

“Come to find out, hardly no one outside Maine said it. So I figured, why not?”

Another major difference between LDS and the new Jeezum Crow church include church-sanctioned mud-runs.

“You need to get dirty if you want to get clean, and that’s a good metaphor for our sins,” Desjardins said.

Perhaps the most radical departure is the emphasis on casual swearing, something most LDS members prefer to avoid.

“We’re a Maine church now, gotta let some swear words slip,” Desjardins said.

A member of his congregation agreed. “Friggin right, bub!”

The church doesn’t have an official building as of yet, but is renting out space at the local Grange hall in the meantime.

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22 thoughts on “Maine Mormons Form New Church of Jeezum Crow of Latter Day Saints”

    1. As an apostate lds I say funny. Not wicked funny but amusin’.
      But your allowed to take issue, I understand.

    2. I disagree. I’m active LDS, and I thought it was great that Seth did his homework. If you can’t handle a lighthearted tweak, then you haven’t arrived as a religion.

      I’ll be sharing it in Ward Council next Sunday.

  1. Just the headline alone had me cackling! This post is awesome. My guess is that there will be Jeezum Crowbar Son! splinter sects soon.

  2. Like your site a lot, but this “story” is NOT good. Poking fun at a religion, especially one that has undergone a lot of discrimination? Not good. Pull the story, put up a brief apology to LDS people and their church, and move on.

  3. “Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people.”

  4. “Bullying (social behaviour)
    Bullying, intentional harm-doing or harassment that is directed toward vulnerable targets and typically repeated.” We are vulnerable because we are Christians, and are supposed to turn the other cheek. Our church name is mentioned and the name of our Savior is defiled. You harass our religion and beliefs and tell us we should be okay with it. But this is sacred to us and I find it not amusing. This article makes you a bully. You want bullying to stop in schools, but you adults seed it on the internet via cyberbullying?

    1. Satire is a way of making fun of people by using silly or exaggerated language. Politicians are easy targets for satire, especially when they’re acting self-righteous or hypocritical. (Vocabulary.com)

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