Controversial Report Claims New Neighbor From Away ‘Actually Pretty Good Guy’

Brooks — People in this Waldo county town are reeling after a new member of the community, originally from Massachusetts, was described favorably by those who’ve met him.

“Soon’s he said he was from Mass I was like ‘Oh Jeezus,'” immediate neighbor Jerry Butler said of the town’s newest resident, Tommy Clark. Clark moved to Brooks from Brockton, MA just two months ago.

Butler introduced himself to Clark not soon after arriving in town.

“Turns out he’s good shit,” Butler said. “I figured since he was from Mass he’d be typical Masshole, but he can friggin party.”

Other people familiar with Clark also find themselves shocked to learn he moved to town from Massachusetts.

“I figured he was from up north or something, as much as he loves to go dirtbiking,” one co-worker said.

“Dude drives a Chevy truck. I ain’t even know Massholes drove normal-people cars,” he continued. “He can flat-ass cut some wood, too.”

Others are suspicious of Clark’s place of origin, claiming he’s “too normal” to be from away.

“He come over couple nights ago to watch the Sox game, and he were into it more than I were!” said new friend Jeff Moody.

“Plus he’s got a wicked killer coke connection down in Mass,” he added.

 

 

New Maine News hats are back!
New Maine News hats are back!

One thought on “Controversial Report Claims New Neighbor From Away ‘Actually Pretty Good Guy’”

  1. Away folks sometimes surprise you. Had an old falmity acquaintance moved to Castine several decades ago, engaged a local carpenter to take the sag out of his shed roof, quote was $50. Deal agreed, then carpenter told him about somebody from ‘away’ that paid him $50 to pur a sag imto his shed roof.

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