Maine’s Newest Farm-to-Table Restaurant Criticized for Not Having Exposed Studs, Ceiling Beams in Dining Room

Appleton – Simmer, the latest eatery to arise from Maine’s foodie movement, is getting poor reviews due to the fact much of the building’s structural components are hidden from view by finishing touches.

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When the owners decided to remodel the 19th century farm house in which Simmer is located, they opted to leave up the original plaster walls and ceilings.

“Is this place even farm to table?” wonders one review on Yelp. “It looks like a farmhouse, but you can’t even seen a single stud or beam.”

Others were concerned with the comfortable seats and tables.

“I want a cozy experience when I dine, the kind I imagine poor people experience. How can I feel poor if the silverware comes from matching sets?” another negative review on Trip Advisor reads.

The restaurant has everything else it needs to be successful. Located at the end of a long and dusty road, one that’s all but impassable in mud season, Simmer is hard to find and hard to get to.

Reservations must be made months in advance, and the ingredients are sourced locally from organic farmers whose ample farmlands and trustfunds afford them the luxury of growing heritage tomatoes.

Simmer released a statement on its Instagram page promising to bring a less comfortable, draftier experience for next season.


11 thoughts on “Maine’s Newest Farm-to-Table Restaurant Criticized for Not Having Exposed Studs, Ceiling Beams in Dining Room”

    1. They, the neighbors no one knows of but are certainly around when you don’t want company, say there are remains of a family buried in the cellar – but they, the neighbors, say they don’t know of what kind of family – oxen is a possibility or a flock of geese, maybe.

  1. My Aunt Bess raves about their chestnut soup which is made from fresh Maine spring (as in the “spring season) ground water, crushed chestnut shells (including the prickly casings), a pinch of Bell’s seasoning, a spring of juniper bush and a dash of Bay salt (from Penobscot Bay). She says “Idds te dahhy fer”. Her speech is currently impaired as she needs to have her adenoids removed. I was able to get a reservation for Oct. 25 as they close for hunting season (they don’t hunt but it’s too dangerous to come up their road due to past incidents).

  2. Oh man, not another ridiculously priced 2 year wait, shoots and greens restaurant in the boonies.

  3. The fiddle heads are delectable, with just a touch of “general bulk spice” in a large shaker contained from the local IGA, adding depth and a down-home local feel and taste to the dish.

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